Sunday, November 11, 2007
Move On ...
Sunday, October 28, 2007
My Thoughts ..
Hate to hear something bad, not the least being together for once, at least its not really nice i guess to hear all this when people start to degrade, talking about integrity, action and approach to be, and worst that someone don't even realize this, nor to care and without realizing it.
Sadly not even to a point of understanding to spare a thought for me.
Worst, people heart really unpredictable. In front everyone is just like a saint to be, and whereby behind this and that, why people just can't be trueful to themselves.
The least i hate to c is people must really bang their head then they realize the pain.
If life were to be like drama, how nice it would be.
Whatever it is leading to, i guess, its all the action that count to let people has a chance to grad hold of something and to lead to something in regardless of anything. At times i guess i'm really too emotion attach to something and really think too much to care and the behavior to be.
Maybe if i m more naive and simple, the story might change.
To put aside everything or well to simply not to explain, i guess i care that is y here come all the writing .. at times i guess we have to look beyond and not just things on the surface.
Friday, October 26, 2007
Well ..that's it ?
really making me damm lazy, time to wakie ... ever since duno when, i been hopping but i guess i get the answer for now .. i tink ..
Thought by doing this what i feel need to be done, is to avoid and to think it over to minimize things to be and don't wish to know or hear anything to make me feel any worst about it... Always the case, no matter how much the trust can be, it still can be effected somehow or rather .. coz certain things we do care ..or care too much ..best bo chap ..
Intimacy begins when you stop pretending to be perfect and start being real with your partner. We get to know each other better as we reveal and negotiate our differences. - True ?
Lol ..
I try to hide and bring the best out of me soon to be .. moving on ..not to mention the least to be .. i guess well look 4ward for next job ba .. damm slacking for now ..make me think too much :)
Arrgghh don't what to write or don't know how to write ... lol nvm next time ..
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
OUt Of ThE Blue ...
I been Thinking and Wondering .... Isolating and Choose not to Bother by allot of things and Most important clear to the heart .. really too tired to be bother by all those and well I believe in doing things with heart and those who understand will understand ...
Just hate some idiot with no Ethic or Character, and most important today someone Told me to grow up when that someone dun even know what is going on ... and disappointed coz someone who I tend to care and concern for or even to trust till in regards of what other people say.
And that bloody idiot really pisses me off .. coz it’s all too fake .. in front of people wana act like saint and saying words to gain compassion point ? I don't really care about what topic they're saying but just don't like it to be so fake when u r the one who bring up the topic and in the end acts like so innocent dupz. Then after get scold, run to complain again and wana black mouth me again .. kaoz .. if not other day when I m sad, he will be so call around to say he be there .. knn .. what a fake ass ... wana chee hong also don't hong till no ethic and character la. Trying to act noble somemore ...
I guess this is life, everyone change and no one really remember what that someone has do for them in regardless of anything, say one thing but do another thing, and when in need of favors, will run back all the way to suck u up, same goes for r/s, why must till the end still don't understand and keep insist to be so self center. What goes around really come around.
What sadden me or disappoint me is somehow or rather, she still don't understand after happen so many thing, its not about now I change, now I put my heart and means u have to go along my way without realizing the mistake to be. .
How do you communicate with your spouse if it has a short temper and is also impatient and stressed all the time? It kills me because sometimes I feel as if people doesn't understand me or just doesn't want to hear the drama. It always leads into an argument and I can't stand it. People who love each other, but it's difficult for me because I think communication is being put aside, especially when already having a bad day already.
Anger can be a nasty emotion especially when it can't be directed at its true source... sigh always the case to be ... nowadays people r not as trueful, everyone with a motive to be ..be it anything, how many really do understand and not just looking on the surface to be.
As a couple, as friend, it is easy to wake up one day and find ourselves far off-track from where we intended to be. At the beginning of any relationship or anything, we all have great ideals of how the future will be, but without the right plan, the right mind it can be difficult to achieve these.
Unfortunately, things doesn't always work out the way we want. It's a harsh reality when we realize that happily ever after isn't something that comes automatically. Whatever it is, It Takes Two .... A good relationship is one purely based on trust, if nothing else. Being able to be miles apart yet never worrying a minute about what they're doing. Communication at all times is so important, and most importantly, respect for each other and their need for alone time as well as together time.
Two people trusting each other fully, not being afraid to tell the other what one thinks, whether it be good or bad, and the other respecting their opinion. Being able to enjoy the same things with each other, enjoying each other, and being able to take their separate lives and smoothly combine their lifestyles into a couple's lifestyle. After an argument; it's when you can really respect each other's differences and openly discuss feelings at all times.
I guess at times face don't really worth anything or to help us achieve certain things .. Just be trueful and be accountable to our own feeling and heart to be ..
.. Enough of grumbling for now .. ZZzz
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Depress ..LoSt ZZzzz
Must be love again, it is kind of draining me off, yet I cannot let go.
I been reflecting this 2 day, what causes the thing to be in this way.
What I want in my life to be ?
Been hoping that things will change, but I just lost on don’t what to do.
At times the ability to analyze things and to think can really be bad, cause it bring me all over the world to search for the big logic reason behind it.
In relationship, I want something which make me feel love, very love .. and to be thoughtful, considerate, sweet and be a lovely couple. Be proud of having each other, be there for each other. But till now I m so lost that I hate to speak up, every single things I do nor I speak tend to be understandable. Every single action turn me off.
I always say things r simple, issit me who make it so complicated to be ?
Or am I demanding too much to suit what I want, but the more I think, the more I find it unreasonable at times. The path to walk down is already not easy, y can’t we understand this and to make things for the better to be. If 2 person to be together, is to be truthful then y can’t put down certain pride to think and to understand, instead of letting certain rashness onto our head.
I can always be flexible, to give in and never meant to calculate each and single things to be. All I wan is to understand and to prevent it from happen again.
What does the great wise man say, to learn from the bad and improve, taking in negative as a positive feedback. If do treasure, I guess we will always give in and to make things work.
Damm it at times I really blame myself for doing so many reading to understand how to be a better person or how to understand a person more to be, or even to read positive thingy till at the end of the day, I just wish everyone to have a trueful heart to see things and do things, or m I damm native to be.
Sigh, depression mode again till so lost and feeling less, just very lost till I am giving up everything, no mood to do anything even thought I know my heart is feeling damm sad in it, just wish to cry or just let go. For r/s is really making me crazy, and the feeling of emptiness once again is there, feeling of losing something is there.
I always do thing with my heart and asking for a little appreciation and yet at the end of the day being taken for granted, or well for not treasuring it.
Where is the balance of oneself to be ?
Is it too much to ask for a r/s to be understanding, sharing, considerate, thoughtfulness , be a lovely couple, to be proud of having and to have a balance, to able to communicate.
Everything around me since to be so disappointing for now, maybe if I m lesser sensitive, less emotion to be I guess I be better of .. or well be a bad guy .. trying but to be honest hard to be lol .. just tired of my damm life, have to think for this and that, have to plan money and etc .. and yet who understand or even the life I went though .. ye grumbling Zzz
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
Writing a letter ...
Hi,
Heh, has no mood to work, my mind is all about you.
The time I spend with u, is something which I am looking forward everyday.
But I m a human too, I wana be dote and love and someone to rely on when I m stress, tired and etc.
Not asking allot but expecting the least of consideration you can give it to me.
Knowing u too well what u get angry for, what thing u don’t like, that is why I avoid doing it even at the means of costing my freedom and etc. U never say it (maybe that is how u feel) but the way u put it show it very clearly.
Example, if I never pick up your phone, its like gona cause another quarrel to happen and worrying u that u be unhappy, I try to avoid things like this to happen.
In life, I don’t know how u understand it but all I can say it is kind of wrong, way of approach and attitude, also the way u r seeing things. But u r not totally hopeless, I told u before, u choose to escape or well avoid to protect yourself in a way, this is wat u tink, but end up u r hurting yourself in a way too and taking away certain happiness and not cherish of what u have, u always demand and thus making it sound like always not enough.
To you, yesterday I may say allot of things that u think I sound bad, but what I say is facts and always take things positive and prove it to me or others that u can do it .. and making your life more worthwhile .. making u more capable to handle things and etc.
At times we have to reflect the things we do, if u ever do have dreams and something u wana achieve, then u have to change for the better to suit the environment and know how to be tactical and adaptable.
U might have your own way, yur way of seeing things, but it take no harm to listen and analyze.
Ever think why u have so many problems or ever think you things is not going smoothly. And why people keep asking me to leave you. Because of the way you portrait to others as an arrogant, bossy, proud and etc .. to u, u may not tink this way, third party always has the clearer view. In work we have to learn to outsmart them. Things don’t just work by showing working OT everyday and etc. But personal skill is important too.
To me because I know u and coz I love u,so advising u, not cause I m complaining, if not I would not spent time to write or to sms. I wana see my dear u to progress further, I wana be a pillar for u.
I know u too well for your temple and the way u handle things, but still there is no point being so head strong and self center. Saying all this not because I wan u back badly, even though I do hope. But the main point is to clarify and make u understand, take it as someone who is supporting u quietly at one side who dun hope for any return, but for someone whom he love dearly. Do it for yourself or be it for your family, not for me, when things happen, we have to be tactical to handle it.
Take your surrounding people and what u see in your daily life as example. If u do feel the same way and know how to say them about their attitude and etc, have u ever think that u r doing this also without knowing it.
Yes in love, I can give in to u everything, but in life to progress and for integrity, that should not be the way.
I been wondering .. and I don’t deny I really do love u, and everything I do, I do it willingly for u.. always wana share with u wat I know and never have the intention to hide unless it’s a while lie and for the seek of certain ego.
I really feel like dropping tears writing this letter .. but somehow I have to face it and I really don’t feel good and finding things to make me occupy coz I know myself too well, I might end up duno drunk where or doing foolish thing, love always being my blind spot.
I duno wat to say .. wondering should I hope for it ..i really duno anything for now .. but I do know one thing I love u and for the best of u, I respect whatever decision and again hopping things goes smoothly for u ..
Take a min to read it and try to understand … and well don’t anyhoe trust ppl, also muz take care, when u r sick then do wat u need to get better, dun be stubborn. Avoid heatly things, smoke less …slp early, a goal and dreams can only be achieve with positive mindset .. and to improve to gain the respect and acknowledge from people.
Till then I guess I will MIA for awhile … to collect back my feeling or watever, and maybe u may say not my business or wat, but I guess that fulfill what u have say to me, not to harass u .. lol wat a bad word to use .. I m just a fool who believe in love …
Love u always now and then .. take a look at our gorillanmonkey.blogspot.com ya .. whatever is there is all for u to read, I do that blog also for us .. and now it no longer matter …
*Hmm Emo time .. lol
My WG Profile ...
*The above is for her
*The below is hope she understand the point
Success is all about growing oneself, learning thru experince and strive for it.
USING EVERY ENCOUNTER AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO EVALUATE, COACH AND BUILD SELF-CONFIDENCE.
Where success is concerned, people are not measured in inches, or pounds, or college degrees, or family background; they are measured by the size of their thinking. How big do we think determines the size of our accomplishments.
The real test of a speaker is not did he stand straight or did he make any mistakes in grammar, but rather did the audience get the points he wanted to put across.
*The below is what i feel in MeIt is not how much you do, but how
much LOVE you put in the doing… <--- this is what loving her means to me.
